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Impossible Diets and Long Lost Friends

Well it’s now May and once again, as is becoming my spring ritual, I am guilty of all charges laid before me.

-Failure to adhere to a straightforward (impossible) diet.

-Failure to assist slimming leaders with their enquiries (not turning up for weigh-ins).

-Failure to comply with ANY rules concerning diets (out and out scoffing).

-Wrongly believing that just saying the words “I’m on a diet” will make me slim.

-Failure to remove any labels from my new gym kit (let alone wear it).

Despite this, I have been known to go to the gym. In fact I have been twice. Once to join and again to look around. I ended up having an asthma attack the second time which was funny really as firstly I don’t actually have asthma and secondly, I had not done any exercise. It turned out to be hayfever related but it was too late. My somewhat feeble relationship with the gym was finished.

So four months in, half a stone heavier and approximately £300 out of pocket I have come to the conclusion that not only is life too short for such turmoil but more importantly, nobody actually cares whether my bottom should be a couple of inches smaller than it is now. Well actually, that’s not strictly true as I do, or did, care. I have been telling myself that this silly diet was all about developing self-esteem, greater confidence, inner happiness and damn it, was for the good of the country! However, I now realise that occasionally shoving an Easter egg down my throat at breakneck speed is much more effective – as is a simple act of kindness.

Such was my delight at recently receiving a small gift from a friend through the post, my bottom obsession temporarily diminished. “There are much more important things in life than small bottoms”, I suddenly realised.

My parcel contained a book that my friend thought I might enjoy. Not only, I suspect, did this gesture make her feel very good indeed, but more importantly, it made my heart soar! What a treat it was when I discovered that the name on the packaging was mine for a change. I’m not ashamed to say I had a little tear when I opened it and realised that my friend, who I seldom get to see these days as she lives so far away, was thinking of me. Ahhhh. In these grown up times of our lives, when family and work…and well, family and work eat up the days then weeks then months, I find it harder than ever to spend quality time with friends. This all got me thinking about a very good friend of mine who emigrated a decade ago.

She became a mum last year so was probably going through it a bit, prompting me to gift her something unexpected. So as well as sending her a pedicure kit (she always had terrible feet!) I also included some of our fabric wall letters spelling ‘Millie’, her daughter’s name  (Of course here at www.littlelucywillow.co.uk we have plenty of other beautiful gifts to browse through at your leisure!

Anyway, my friend was bouncing back and forth over the moon doing a merry jig when she received them from what I could gather, so all was good on both sides of the world for a spell. She was delighted that her old mucker still cared, and I almost forgot that my bum is probably a bit bigger than I would like it to be. Everyone’s a winner in the gifting game!

Anyway, the crux of it is that money can’t buy a pert bottom (unless you’re a gazillionaire) so surely it’s much better to treat your friends and get a hefty shot of the feelgood factor while you’re at it? We could even take it one step further by ditching the never-to-be-used gym membership in order to invest in future generations instead. You see, just as jewellery, art and that ghastly collection of Toby jugs your auntie Florrie has been threatening to bequeath you, can be passed through the ages, so can a timeless piece of furniture.

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